Category Archives: Work
That’s right… It’s TAKS week again. :P
For those of you that have been reading for any amount of time, you’ve seen a post like this many, many times. We’re state testing this week, which means hours upon hours upon hours of me strolling around classrooms full of students. Needless to say my poor blog will suffer. Sorry if posts are a little light this week.
Have a good one!
or “Oh Lord! People Must Think I’m a Crackhead, I’m Scratching So Much!” Also, my eyes jerking randomly to check the floor and myself doesn’t help, I’m sure. Also, also, I’m sorry to be posting about the same thing twice in a row, but when you’re entrenched in combat there is little time to think of other things.
This morning, upon arriving at work, I glanced down at my gray pants to find an army of fleas storming the keep, so to speak. UGH! Seven or eight fleas were slowly making their way up my legs. I leaped into action, pinching the little bastards from my trousers, gathering three or four between the thumb and forefinger of each hand. Using the back of my hand, I dispensed some ultra high tech suspension liquid* onto my desk and released my prisoners into it, then killing them at my leisure**.
I then rushed to my supply stealthily*** closet, grabbing my industrial sized can of specialized flea immobilizing and debilitating spray**** and spraying the hell out of anything on the floor that a) was jerking creepily on the floor toward me or b) small and black. The enemy must have had some sort of defensive shield because I was soon hacking and coughing in a cloud of my own weaponized spray.
Around me, though, the bodies of my enemies twitched and jerked in the pools of death. For good measure, I destroyed their bodies with my deadliest of weapons: my own hands. The battle is won, but just like the Great Ant Invasion of 2004, I am sure the enemy is regrouping and will redouble their efforts.
The floor is littered with the crushed corpses of my enemy and I feel nothing*****.
The weapons of my warfare:
*read: it was hand sanitizer
**read: pinching their little heads off as fast as possible
***jerking and scratching and looking for all the world like a huge crackhead
****generic disinfectant… Kind of like a more noxious, school approved version of Lysol
*****Except for itching
Sorry, folks. No white conch shell here. But at least no Piggys will die, eh? ;)
This is getting ridiculous! As I mentioned a while ago, our campus (not just my classroom) has been inundated with fleas. ::shudder:: Just thinking about it makes me itchy. :(
At first, I have to admit, I thought maybe a student had brought some from home with them but as time went on and the kill count the truth became apparent. I talked with other teachers and sure enough, they were having the same thing happening. Of course, we alerted our administration that fleas had taken up residence and they promptly called maintenance to come and spray… Outside… (O_O)
That’s right! They sprayed the grass OUTSIDE and did nothing for the little buggers that were in our classrooms leaving red marks all over our ankles! To make matters worse, the day that they sprayed it rained. And it rained the next day. AND the next day. (Seriously! SO ITCHY just thinking about it! ACK!) I don’t know much about pesticide, but I doubt it works very well when it gets washed away by torrential South Texas rain. But I could be wrong. (Even though I doubt it.)
Given the situation, we are all pretty paranoid about it. Our eyes scan any bare skin regularly, seeking out the little paracites. I find myself jumping at flecks of pepper, pen marks (cause I’m messy like that) and even freckles that I know are there! Little tickles and itches that would normally be dismissed and ignored are suddenly VERY IMPORTANT. As I type my earring brushed my neck and made me slap myself… Cause I’m smart like that.
Today alone, I’ve killed four fleas that I caught in the act. Filthy little beasts. Can anyone tell me what ecological purpose fleas serve? I mean, I know that while mosquitos are just as annoying and ITCHY they are a souce of food for birds (as adults) and fish (as larva). What about fleas? Are there any “benefits” to fleas. I mean, sure, they carry the Plague and typhus and who doesn’t love that, but what other benefits are there? O_o
I actually managed to get a semi-decent picture of one of my attackers. I killed him carefully (not carfully) to preserve the look of horror on his evil little face!
::shudder:: I think I need to go take a four hour bath in boiling water with lye soap and bleach!