But I mean, really, who DOESN’T love the internet?
If you’ve even wondered about the titles to some of my posts, just know that I usually write the title first and I don’t particularly care if the content doesn’t end up matching. Or sometimes I just write whatever comes off the top of my head. Now you know… And knowing is half the battle! Har har har!
I’m sure I don’t have to tell you that I spend a lot of time on the internet. I am a blogger, after all. And like most bloggers, a lot of that time goes to reading other blogs. I love blogs. Really. I LOVE blogs. There’s something wonderfully delicious about seeing into the lives of others, even if they’re not being completely straightforward, you still get a glimpse of something that is “them”.
One of my favorite things about the world of blogging, besides allowing me to indulge my voyeuristic side, is being able to get some insight on people who I admire and respect. There are only a few “celebrities” that I follow and I don’t think any of them would make much of a blip on most people’s radar, with the exception of Neil Patrick Harris who I follow on twitter. I’ve never been very big on fawning over celebrities. I mean, most of the on-screen crushes that I’ve had over the years have been on characters, not actors. (Case in point, while I may have been slightly enamored of Aragorn from Lord of the Rings, Viggo Mortensen isn’t my cup of tea.) Not that I look down on people that do make a big deal about celebrities (much). I just don’t feel it myself.
But, (huge, enormous BUT!) I do get all nervous and fluttery about people who I admire creatively and intellectually. Yes, I get all fan girl-y about authors and I have to admit that if I ever got the opportunity to meet Neil Gaiman, I’d probably lose it! And if I ever found myself even in his vicinity I would probably pretend that I don’t see him (like I did when we saw JoCo walking by us in Austin. Idiot.) so that I don’t look like a creepy fan (which as I’m writing this, it’s becoming clear that I am) and I definitely wouldn’t talk to him because I wouldn’t know what to so and I’d be sure that I’d come off as a fan girl (which I am) and say something that would make a total fool of myself (which I would) for fear of looking like an idiot (which I’m not… I don’t think) in front of one of my all-time favorite writers (which he is). ::deepbreath:: PHEW!
The thing is, though, that as I get little peeks into the world of these people who I admire and hope to emulate, the more I want to be one of them. I love watching this insanely talented group of creative, geeky people interact with each other in ways that I never dreamed of. They tweet @ each other, hang out together, do public events together in glorious overlapping ways that I had no idea were possible (until I discovered their blogs, twitter, etc) as I came to respect them individually. It amazes me being able to share, even a little bit, in that world.
I get the jokes. I think the same thoughts. I’ve felt the same isolating aloneness of being different. Watching them, a little part of me that has lain dormant for too long, wakes up and stretches. A little voice that has been hushed by trying to fly under the radar screams with glee! “Yes! Me too!” It’s exhilerating and terrifying…
It feels like coming home.
“I want to see life. I want to hold it in my hands. I want to leave a footprint on the sand of a desert island. I want to play football with people. I want,” he said and then he paused and he thought, “I want everything.”
– Nobody Owens from The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman