Bee Careful

What are your thoughts on bees? Me? I hate the little flies with stingers. And, yes, I know that they’re a necessary evil and yes, they are evil. But I’ve had… Problems… with bees in the past. There was a period of about two years when I couldn’t go to a gas station in any kind of moderate weather without at least one bee coming over to check me out (’cause our gas stations in the area always have bees swarming around the trash cans). I dealt with it like any rational, thinking person would do: backing away frantically with a terrified (and I’m sure hilarious) expression on my face going “Uuuuuaaaaaeeeeeeeiiiiiii!!!”

I mean, how can you not look at those horrible little faces (Use your imagination. Or Google it. I’m trying not to steal pictures that aren’t mine and I tried to draw a bee face, but it was full a fail and you KNOW I’m not about to go take a picture of a bee! Just go Google bee face and then come back! Geez!) and the plot for the destruction of mankind? Think that’s crazy? Look at it from the bee perspective: What do bees need to survive? Flowers. Where do flowers grow? Wherever there’s green stuff. What’s happening to all the green stuff? Us. I rest my case. In the eyes of the bee agenda, WE are public enemy number one. That’s right. The BEE AGENDA.

So, it seems, the bees have discovered the nature of my feeling for them (abject terror) and have decided to use it to their advantage. Me being a high-ranking and influential person and all, they know that if they can take me out of the picture, their rise to power is pretty well assured. Their power play? They’re hanging out in the computer lab.

Not Even Joking.

Bees.

In our computer lab.

I had to leave. I’m not even kidding. This morning there was one in the lab and it landed on the floor maybe a yard or two away from me and looked at me. And as you already know, bee faces freak me out. THEY HAVE MANDIBLES!! ::shudder::

Anyway, bee on floor s-t-a-r-i-n-g at me. I froze, my eyes locked with the wretched bee. One of the students in the lab followed my gaze and got up to squish it (Yay!) but the other teacher in the lab wouldn’t let him (Not so yay.) and carried the blasted thing outside on a piece of paper. I warned her of the plot to overthrow mankind, but she wouldn’t listen. Well, maybe not, but I did scoff at her bee saving ways. But the bee was out of my general vicinity. Score one for me!

Then. After lunch, I’m in the lab, minding my own business and I see something buzzing around the room. It’s flying like a regular old housefly so I ignore it. UNTIL the other teacher in the lab (a different one than earlier) starts watching it make its way around the room. I look up and sure enough: A bee!! And this time he brought a friend to work the other side of the room!! TWO BEES! I watched them for a while, but lost sight of one of them… I had to leave. No matter where I turned, I could feel their little bee eyes looking at me.

And thus I was driven out of the computer lab… I only fear… What next?

*If anyone can draw me a decent and accurate bee face I will so post it here!*

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About Melme

Can I have some coffee now, please?

Posted on February 17, 2010, in Me, POISON!!, Random, Rants, Work. Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. I can’t even bring myself to make fun of you because of my own personal bee terror. O.O

  2. I just looked outside my classroom to see what the ruckus was (One of the guys was yelling at his friend from across the “courtyard”… No malice, just laziness.) and pulled my head back in quickly due to bee fear… So wish I was kidding.

    AND why the heck is the “logout” button more prominent than the “submit comment” button?! Not that I just did that or anything… >_>

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