I get this feeling sometimes when I examine my life…

I get this strange feeling so strong when I think about staying where I am (location, job) for the rest of my life…

I get this strange feeling when I look at the success of my favorite authors and how long it took them to get where the are…

I get this feeling and it isn’t small. Sometimes it feels so big I’m afraid it will show. It feels so big I don’t know if I can take it anymore…

It’s a gnawing in the pit of my stomach.

It’s a tightness in my throat.

It’s tears filling the back of my eyes that I choke back so no one sees.

It’s a hunger that scares me more than I can say…

I feel the urge to lash out. To ball my fists, to hit something, to scream, to bite to kick to cry to shut my eyes and hold my breath and sleep because that’s all I can do.

I get this feeling sometimes… And I don’t know what to do.


About Melme

Can I have some coffee now, please?

Posted on November 10, 2009, in Musings. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

  1. “Ooga chaka ooga chaka.
    I can’t stop this feeling.
    Ooga chaka ooga chaka.” :-)

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