NaNoWriMo Update

I know, I know. This seems to be all I’m doing lately, but… Well, it is all I’ve been doing lately! Just ask the hubby.

So, I seem to have settled into being around 4000 words behind. This is thanks to the days off from writing due to the sty I got in my right eye and the treatment that leaves said eye foggy. Let me tell you, this can be very annoying when you’re trying to type.

Anywho, I’ve been keeping copies of my story on various websites and storage devices so that the only possible way for me not to be able to work on my story on the computer is for there not to be a computer present. (In which case, I pull out the old paper and pencil.)

• I have a copy on the hard drive of my work computer
• AND my new netbook
• I’m keeping the text in a private blog post on my old story blog that has nothing on it anymore
• I’m keeping a copy in google docs
• I’m keeping a copy on my flash drive (This is the only one that doesn’t get updated very often.
• And, of course, the copy in my head that gets attention when I can’t type OR write. This is also beneficial for the paper and pencil sessions when I need to remember what was just happening.

So, yeah, I’ve got the data issue covered.

Lastly, just something I thought I’d share. On my story blog, the last comment I got was from my husband saying:

“Finish it!!! ;)”

Every time I log in to update there, I see it and it gives me a little bit of motivation. Thanks Babe! (^_^)

…yeah

I get this feeling sometimes when I examine my life…

I get this strange feeling so strong when I think about staying where I am (location, job) for the rest of my life…

I get this strange feeling when I look at the success of my favorite authors and how long it took them to get where the are…

I get this feeling and it isn’t small. Sometimes it feels so big I’m afraid it will show. It feels so big I don’t know if I can take it anymore…

It’s a gnawing in the pit of my stomach.

It’s a tightness in my throat.

It’s tears filling the back of my eyes that I choke back so no one sees.

It’s a hunger that scares me more than I can say…

I feel the urge to lash out. To ball my fists, to hit something, to scream, to bite to kick to cry to shut my eyes and hold my breath and sleep because that’s all I can do.

I get this feeling sometimes… And I don’t know what to do.

Blog Title

Quick post. With the rash of “I can’t stop loving [fill in the blank]” making me a little uncomfortable, I ask you, my fair readers, with my niffy first poll ever I ask, what do you think:

NaNoWriMo Update

Hi all! I’ve added a wordcount widget to the sidebar. It’ll track my progress and how many days I have left…

So far, I’m 4000 words behind due to some eye problems mid week and I’ve been playing catchup all weekend. I managed to get in 3000 words yesterday, but I really don’t know if I’m going to be able to get this done in time. My, my… What did I get myself into?

Weird searches

If my top searches mean anything, a lot of people really want to stop loving their teachers… Sorry, kids! I don’t have the answers for you!

Ponderings

What happens to the boundless imagination and creativity that we have as children? I remember having endless ideas for endless stories and games and playing pretend endlessly… Where did it go?

See you… In De-cem-ber!

As I mentioned yesterday, I’ve decided to participate in NaNoWriMo this year… Who’d have thunk writing 50,000 words would be so HARD?!

I’m at 3,400 and I’m a day behind!! So, yeah… The blog’s getting put on the back burner. Sorry guys!

I’m gonna do it this year!

So, yeah. NaNoWriMo… 50,000 words by the end of the month! Sheesh, that’s a lot but I’m gonna try my dardest!

I’m melme54 if anyone cares!

Dramatis Personae

Do you ever look around yourself and get the feeling that everyone around you is just playing a role that they think they’re supposed to?

Lately, I’ve been finding shopping to be one of the most depressing activities in the world. Well, not shopping per se, but anywhere that there are large amounts of people engaging in an activity mundane enough that they let their guard down.  Do you ever look around while grocery shopping and see your fellow zombies no longer attempting to maintain the facade? It bums me out. Which is why I prefer not to grocery shop during peak times. Give me 11PM on a weeknight over after work or on Sunday anytime! I think the moms with dead eyes are the worst…

Anyway, that’s not really what I logged in to write about. I’ve been thinking a lot, as I’ve already mentioned. And I’ve been mostly thinking about my future and what I want to do with my life hereafter. I love the idea of being a writer, but I’m not sure that it’s lucrative enough to be a reasonable choice of career. Especially with Aaron in school right now. So, for now that gets the back burner. So, I teach. Or something like that. (What do you do when even YOU know what you’re teaching is bulls–t?) I think more and more I’m coming to see that the lack of tangible results with teaching is leaving me unsatisfied. Maybe I’d do better doing something that creates a product. That was awfully gratifying as a barista. I loved making a quality product that left my customers satisfied. So very gratifying! But meaningless too.

I say this chafing against meaningless work is the product of being told a million times throughout our childhoods that we “can do anything!” I don’t know about you, but I think that the sense of entitlement that that idea has fostered has caused generations of people to feel like they need more. More than a drudgerous, middle of the road job. We need to DO something with our lives! What a load… I’m gonna go see if Walmart is hiring greeters. Might as well get a jump on it, right?

“Don’t put one foot in your job and the other in your dreams, Ed. Go ahead and quit, or resign yourself to this life. It’s too much of a temptation for fate to split you right up the middle before you’ve made up your mind which way to go.” from Player Piano by Kurt Vonnegut

UPDATE: Kind of lame as far as rants go, I know, but I kind of lost my steam when I didn’t get to write right away… So, yes, this is the gist of what the Uh Oh post was referring to… I hate when that happens!

Uh oh…

Something snapped at work today. I think I’m developing a righteous rant. I don’t have time to go into detail right now, but you’ll hear about it soon enough! ::wicked grin::